I received the very sad news that a dear old friend from high school died this morning. I knew he was very ill for a while; nevertheless, the news of his passing was a shock. I reached out to other friends to express my sadness, but I still need a way to express how special he was to me. Not in a romantic way, but in a way that I will always remember as a close friendship with a kind, funny, friendly guy who always radiated happiness and positivity. He had a million friends in high school, so I don't claim to be anyone special, but he was special to me.
It was a long, long time go that I first met Mike. The chronology is a little fuzzy, but I believe it was sophomore year. He was a year behind me, but we ended up in a Science Fiction class together, Miss Ambrosio was our teacher (the tiny details your brain hangs onto!) Somehow we paired up to do a project. The subject I can't remember, but it involved a slide show and a tape recorder; a "science-y" story or script of a radio play. There was an image of sun-dappled water in a swimming pool. Mike used to come to my house, or we'd sometimes meet at his, where we would brainstorm ideas until we had a pretty good result, we thought.
My house was in Forbes, his in Urdaneta, (for those who remember) and he used to walk me home from his house, or at least accompany me to the main road catch a cab (some things I don't remember). One time he invited me to a youth group get-together, sponsored by Union Church. My family belonged to a different church, but I looked forward to the meeting. His lovely mom welcomed me into the house, and was so cheery and sweet, welcoming me warmly to the group. I can remember her face so clearly. We played a game, where we held a piece of newspaper behind our backs and tried to tear out the shape of a muscial note. I must be pretty dexterous, because I "won" the game.
Later on, maybe my junior year, I tried out for the spring musical, "Hello Dolly". I met this really cute guy during tryouts, and we dated for a while. He was one of the leads, and I was in the chorus. It was a heady time for me, as he was pretty popular, and teen-idol cute. Right before the play's production, he broke up with me; terrible timing. Mike was part of the stage crew and he knew what was going on. I was clearly sad and mopey, sitting alone in the dark auditorium during breaks in the rehearsals. He would come sit by me and offer a shoulder.
One evening after play practice at the theater, we walked to the highway together (EDSA, for those who were there) to catch cabs to go home. As we waited, a car with one headlight approached, and Mike said "PERDIDDLE!" and gave me a peck on the cheek. I had never heard of this little game .. how fun!
My family was moving out of the country after Christmas. I went to the Winter Formal with Mike's best friend. In the meantime, Mike had fallen hard for the beautiful girl who eventually became his wife. I was trying to get Mike's attention to say good bye, but he was completely focused on his new girlfriend. It was a sad evening for me, to be leaving all my friends and the school I had come to love, but I tried to be a good sport for my date. I hope I wasn't bad company.
Many, many years later, I ran into Mike at a reunion in San Jose. I was so happy to see him so happy with his high school sweetheart (and with 6 children!) He still remembered my blue eyes (full disclosure, they were blue contacts all along!) He was still the funny, friends-with-everyone guy of my memories.
I can't put into words the grief and the sense of loss we have for classmates from our TCK lives who have left this world. For some reason the bonds we share with these friends are stronger and more intense than most. Probably because of the unusual circumstances in which we lived, and our having been immersed in the vibrant and exotic cultural antithesis of the all-American teenager. The In Memoriam list from IS Manila has grown far, far too long, and even though I know these losses will happen more and more as time marches on, it helps to know that we can share our sorrow with our barkada*. We once again gather together (albeit digitally) to mourn and reflect, and remember. We will never forget.
Fair winds and following seas, Mike ... Thanks for the special memories that I will always cherish. You were unique in so many ways, and completely unforgettable. My heart breaks for the ones you left behind; I wish for them peace, and that they will find some comfort in their memories of you, a great man.
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| We kinda had the same weird sense of humor. |
*group of friends
